Well, I did it!
After a month of praying and waiting the 24th arrived and I was able to go through with it! I feel good knowing that what started me on this trail and I was worried I would do the same thing as before… I got up, trusted God that everything was in His will. I slept good last night. I no longer look at October 24th as horrible anymore, I just conquered it!
Thank you Lord for being with me, and helping me through!
Four years ago today I got Shugums! She is my crazy cat. She doesn’t like much attention, but when she does, she only likes me to pet her. Oh sure others pet her… but I am the only one she really cuddles with. She is my blessing. Happy Got Day Shug!
Day after we got her
Through the years
Psalms 56:11, “In God have I put my trust: I will not be afraid what man can do unto me. “
God is good! In your darkest hour turn to Him! God made you… what can man do…?
Over time I am getting better… Each day I must determine what I am going to be like. Will I let fear win or will I trust God throughout the day. That choice makes a difference.
Nights are rough for me, since they get my mind thinking. My head has also gotten sensitive at night again, so I am more susceptible to headaches. Whenever I feel one coming on I rub an ice cube on my face, or rinse with cold water. It helps my mind not focus on my head, and turns it to how cold my face is.
I am trying to gather and keep all the courage and strength I can for the 24th. I see it as a brick wall I must get through, and even if I am bruised at least I will be through. God is my strength and he will help me.
I feel as if I have lost the grip on my life… I want to do something, but I don’t want to. Like chores. The little things can sometimes be hard to just do.
I am trying to be in God’s word more. I am reading the book again called “Be Still, My Child.” I first read it when God was teaching me about trust and faith the first time. Also I found a commentary on Psalms by Charles Spurgeon I am going to try and read that too. I am also going through James once a week with my sister, and of course the Bible study book. I just pray that the Lord will help me get back on my feet.
Today is Mothers Day… Which for the past seven years has been a difficult day. Even though I don’t have a Mother now, I look back and remember the good times, and I think about all the Mothers I know. (My grandmother Etc.)
I hope you love your Mother, and If you do that you tell her that. Please tell her you love her if you do. If you don’t ask your Mom to tell you about all she does for you, you will change your mind. And even if she doesn’t seem to love you, love her anyway… that is what love is.
Today has been an interesting day for me. At first I thought it was going to be bad… but it ended up not being too bad. Keeping busy helps. (Keeps my mind off of things)
Sadly they leave tomorrow, and I will miss them.
My oldest brother and his family are down from Minnesota this weekend! Last night we played games until 3:30 a.m. Right now he and my other brother are playing games. It is nice to see my Brother, sister in law, two nephews, and my niece!
Over the past month I have began to noticed how I view myself differently.
Yesterday I told my sister that for once in my life I accept everything about myself. My flaws, my gifts, my quirks, and just plain ole me. Feeling good about myself makes me feel really good. I can laugh at myself, take advice, and be me more freely.
God is good. This trial is the best thing that couldn’t happened. I am less fearful, and I like myself! Thanks to the Lord I have made it through… It brings me to tears just thinking about all He has done for me these past six months.
Well it has been two months that I have had Serafina. Shugums and her seem to be getting along the best that they will. Whenever they pass each other they have to tackle one another. Other then that they leave each other alone.
Romans 8:37 “Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. ” We can conquer through Him.
2 Samuel 22:7 “In my distress I called upon the LORD, and cried to my God: and he did hear my voice out of his temple, and my cry did enter into his ears.” I can call on Him, and He will win!
Psalm 7:10 “My defence is of God, which saveth the upright in heart.” He will win. He saves us!
Proverbs 3:11 “My son, despise not the chastening of the LORD; neither be weary of his correction: For whom the LORD loveth he correcteth; even as a father the son in whom he delighteth.” He is like a father and He will do what is right.
Joh 16:33 “These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.” He has Won!